No Wedding, Marriage Please


I have recently had the privilege to witness a separated couple tussle over custody of their son. Trust me; you don’t want to be in that woman’s shoes. Having witnessed their marriage and break-up, I’m left with more questions than answers on marriage success.

Marriage is probably a common denominator when it comes to the dreams we all have. I cannot get more honest than this; am not sure I still long to take the plunge.

Is it that people change after days of living together reducing them to mere housemates?

Take a step or two backwards. I am still not sure if I need a disclaimer before I speak my mind. Maybe this will do: I have nothing against marriage, I also hope to get married one day and more importantly- I am straight.

Ladies want children but not all of them want the man to tag along. Some people will blame it on modernity or permissiveness in the society.

A shocker of a survey released recently confirmed my fears. Six out of 10 women in Kenya are likely to be single mothers by the time they are 45 years old.

Look around you, how many single mothers do you see? Get some pebbles because you’ll definitely run out of fingers.

Society will baptize it as a moral rot on the side of ladies but I think otherwise. Where are the “proper-mannered’’ men who fathered these children?

They are a picture of failed marriages or a newly developed phobia for commitment. Who wouldn’t be afraid of condemning themselves to solitude the rest of their days?

Any time one says they fear commitments; they are labeled perverts. These people are just being honest, a virtue that idealism will never afford.

My reason for thinking so results from a craze you may have noticed as I did. People are getting into marriage as a destination and not as part of a life-long journey.

There’s more to life after “I do,” a fact that we have refused to acknowledge. While wearing the blindfold called a wedding, couples are walking themselves into a life imprisonment.
In this case, I prefer a state convict who has a chance of getting out alive. I dread the thought of having to spend years beside regret, if you get what I mean.

It is better to remain single than die of heart ache. Patience is what we need in abundance, even though it looks like the gold rush is already into our heads.

Get off the wedding craze and start getting married.


One response »

  1. According to Myles Munroe, whether man or woman, you need to get the definition of God’s purpose for each gender before you get married. It is in Genesis, garden of Aden. Also Solomon says a good wife(I guess converse applies) is not an inheritance from any parent or anyone but God. I know that the blessings of God make rich but adds no sorrow. The greatest wealth is peace. So seek this peace then any wealth falling on it will be enjoyable. This is the wealth of the new testament even Jesus the Christ. He says seek ye first the kingdom of God and all His righteousness and all this other things shall be added. Remember seeking implies you have to sacrifice certain pleasures.
    For me the greatest blame is that we have embraced the outward of the cup not the inner. Only god knows the inner. Secular media(including bad social media use) in partnership with Hollow-woods of the world, are causing the greatest damage to humanity. Remember garbage into the mind garbage out. usually the garbage comes out after being incubated and growing up so the harvest is bigger. The devil will bring it out at his time on his terms. Guard your heart/spirit above all things because from it oozes the wells of life. meditate on this.


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