I had been seeing her being caressed and appreciated by other people and my blood boiled with anger until 2012 when I finally nailed her. She meant everything to me. Nothing I asked of her was hard for her to deliver. In fact, I became the envy of my clique when they noticed me fondling her in my hands most of the time…all the time. She was my sweetheart and I was going to make good use of her to at least earn some man points if not money.
Today I might call her an idiot because of the new girls in the hood. I can call her a reckless good for nothing idiot because my heart is being conquered by another but I will not stop loving her. I might not like the way she ‘stands out’ every time I put her in my pocket making people stare at me but I still adore her for the good memories we shared. Looking at how far I’ve come with her, I can only but wish her all the best in her life – though she technically has none now that she had her last fall at the hands of Baby Blessing the other day. She meant a lot to me and she still does only that my needs have increased with time while her performance has dwindled at an even faster rate and now is very close to zero. As a result, she can no longer meet my insatiable need of using her.
She introduced me to Twitter and the world of blogging and Denshispeaks was born courtesy of her then fast and unmatched ability to access the internet. I made my first shilling courtesy of her unwavering support of my love for blogging. She knew I could not write unless she lets me and hence thought she was indispensable. She helped me land my first contact and hence led me to my first salary. Little did she know that would be the beginning of the end for her.
I fell in love with a Lenovo B590 but my Idiot did not get jealous because she knew too well that there are some things only her could do for me. She was the only one who could moan every time somebody wanted to have an ear-to-ear conversation with me. She was the only one who could run an errand for me in the name of an SMS and most importantly, she was the only one I could sleep with in bed. She was technically part of me. I loved her for her inconvenience. She was literally with me everywhere and never complained even when I stuffed her in my pocket with my handkerchief during those days flue visited me.
Even though my B590 took over the blogging role from her, she smiled and allowed Lenovo to continue with the job. Her tiredness must have started kicking in.
When my first born daughter came in 2014, she knew that the two years we had been together was enough for her to be a good mother. She could sooth Baby Blessing to sleep at the age of two months with sweet music and wake her up every time someone wanted an ear-to-ear conversation with me. She was her toy and never complained when Blessing tossed her around the house.
Little did we know that Blessing would be the end of her. She endured the tossing and throwing around over the days until she could take no more. I started leaving her with Blessing more and more just to avoid the tantrums of the little girl. My Ideos started feeling neglected by me, her man. She complained but I was too busy to understand her. She cried for my care but Blessing was all I thought of. I only noticed her presence when people called to ask this or that or when I needed to call, text or Whatsapp somebody.
Then came the question of age. She was aging faster than me. While I was adapting to the technological trends, she seemed old fashioned and I started feeling ashamed to flash her around. While in a crowd, I preferred for the world to end before fulfilling my dreams to her ringing. She was becoming clumsy and a nuisance to me. My Ideos was now stressing me more than anything in the world would. She could hang the whole day without bothering to think about my feelings. She discharged faster than she charged.
My all time companion during a long journey could no longer keep me company for more than one hour before her battery run low. I was getting fed up but I still loved her. I realized why polygamy is necessary in this life. I realized why Solomon had over 300 side chicks and still appeared in the Bible. I realized why he is still the wisest man to ever walk this earth. I had to hatch a plan to get this Ideos a co-wife.
As I bid her goodbye, It would be disrespectful to end this relationship without honoring her on this blog. The love we shared was the real deal. It is the kind of love that leaves you satisfied of your accomplishments together when it ends. I will forever remember her as one of the special gadgets that introduced me to my new line of work. Without her, i wonder where and what I would be doing right now. Such love is rare.
As I start my journey with my new found love, things are never going to be the same. My new catch must be secretly a model, otherwise I know not how to describe her slim body. She allows me to cheat on Safaricom with any other person I damn wish without feeling any guilt. When my mind is dirty, she allows me to watch YouTube clips that always ask me about my age before watching. To keep all my attention to herself, she has allowed me to download and install a lot of apps on her. She can handle them, she assures me every time.
It’s a sin of Biblical proportion to forget your first love. I will never forget you my dear Ideos even as I embrace my new love. Adios!!